Saturday, December 18, 2010

All the Mindfulness I Can Muster

Those words came to me while in a fever-induced stupor this week. I thought practicing so much yoga would give me a super immune system. No such luck. I came down with the flu or something like it this past week. I managed to teach my Monday class but then by Tuesday I was out of commission and had to cancel my classes for the rest of the week. Bummer. No classes, no Light on Yoga sequence, no YOGA!

There I was feeling warm, with glazed and glossy eyes, my body drooping without posture. But I still wanted to clean up the kitchen, give my daughter a bath and put her to bed before I took a hot shower and went to bed. Then for some reason it occurred to me that I should still try to be mindful. Even though I felt lousy and just wanted to get through the rest of the evening.

For the rest of the week I could not do much but lie down on the couch or my bed. Luckily my snugly dog was by my side most of the time. In fact I am on my couch right now with Roscoe to my right. I thought about reading and meditating but did not have the energy for that either. So I practiced being mindful. Mindful while miserable. It's easy to be mindful when you feel good.

With this mindfulness I found moments of being soothed and grateful over the past week. Grateful that my husband and daughter wanted to take care of me. Grateful that my 4 year old still likes to hug me. Grateful for the roof over my head. for my dog. for my bathtub that I can soak in with some eucalyptus and healing essential oils. Grateful for those essential oils. For my cozy warm bed. Grateful for homeopathic and non-homeopathic meds. I still had it very good. And then I thought about people who have constant and real suffering in their lives. Why bother being mindful while suffering? Maybe it cultivates more patience, more acceptance of what is rather than what isn't, which in turn gives more strength and perseverance.